When the previews showed some poor girl falling in the rose ceremony, my heart skipped a beat.
There’s not much I love more than seeing somebody fall.
#iknowi’mahorribleperson
I don’t know what comes over me, but I laugh EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I don’t mean to….and I certainly don’t want to….but I just can’t help it.
Just ask my husband.
One time when we were first married he slipped in our entry way and literally flew straight up in the air and landed flat on his back.
Did I run to his aid? Um, no. Did I laugh? Yes. yes I did.
I’m not proud of this character quirk of mine, but tonight I’m going to own it.
#watchyourstep
We ended last week with Kimberly being kicked off and then coming back in to ask Chris for a 2nd chance. Let’s start out by recognizing the fact that this is being filmed in the daylight…which means we are already well into the next day.
Kimberly walks back in and begs to be kept around.
Let’s give the girl a pass because MY WORD she hasn’t slept in like 24 hours!
And she probably hasn’t eaten a carb in at least 2 weeks.
And not eating carbs will make a girl all sorts of weepy, emotional, and cray.
So I’m told.
She pleaded her case, AND CHRIS KEPT HER.
Now let’s all pray for a hedge of protection over Kimberly because I fear that the other girls might kill her in her sleep.
Chris and Harrison chat for a bit about the remaining girls, and then it cuts to a 1:1 interview with our Prince Farming.
And I have two words for the guy.
NO. SIR.
Seriously, Chris. Zip ‘er up.
The first group date card arrives and it says “Show me your country.”
They have a pool party and play chicken.
And I can honestly say that I don’t think I’ve ever played chicken. I guess my mama raised me right.
Before we know it, we see the girls walking down the street in downtown L.A.
In their bikinis.
And I’m no expert in theology, but I’m almost positive this is the the 7th rung of Hell.
They round the corner, and there are a bevy of tractors (because I feel like a group of tractors should totally be called a bevy).
I’m sorry, but OH HELL NO.
I don’t think that I’ve ever cussed on this blog before…but I firmly believe this situation calls for it.
Put yourself in these girls shoes (or wedges, or cowboy boots, or combat boots, or gladiator sandals).
You’re in a bikini.
On the streets of downtown L.A.
AND OH YEAH, ON NATIONAL TELEVISION.
And now you are expected to get on a tractor and ride it.
I can’t even imagine all the shaking and jiggling that would be going onif I was in
a bikini on said tractor.
#nothankyou
#i’mthinkingtherewouldbesomeepicchafing
#byefelicia
Hell To The No.
When the girls got on the tractors and the music started up, I thought it was the Footoose soundtrack and I was filled with happiness and memories.
#everybodycuteverybodycut
But as I listened more closely, it wasn’t. Womp womp.
It was some weird almost Footloose copy (probably because ABC didn’t want to pay for it but still wanted to give us some Footloose flavor.).
Now. Since we’ve mentioned Footloose, I feel like we need to pay proper respect before moving on. Because just the thought of Footloose has me all nostalgic…..
Because THIS.
And THIS.
They cut from the tractor date to follow a couple of girls (Jillian and Megan) sneaking down to Chris’s house. You know, since this season has officially been declared the
“SEASON OF NO RULES”.
But I gotta tell you, I immediately find myself yearning for the structure and boundaries that a well-written rule gives.
Here’s the first rule of Episode 2 that I would like to implement.
Rule 1: All parts of your hiney should be covered at all times.
It’s straightforward and easy to follow, just like a rule should be.
And if you kept watching, you saw that their needs to be a quick addition:
Rule 1b: All front privates should also be properly covered.
It’s just a good rule of thumb really.
Anyhoo, Jillian and Megan break into Chris’s pad, and Megan puts on his helmet and runs her head into the brick wall and the fridge door just to test it out and make sure it’s working properly.
Because that’s totally normal.
Megan, I have a piece of advice for you: perhaps you should keep the helmet on.
Back to the tractor group date.
Mackenzie (the 21 year old mom) gets the 1:1 time from the tractor group date.
So Mackenzie and Chris are on their date, and she drops three bombshells:
1) She likes big noses (huh?), and she tells Chris he has a “very prominent” nose.
CHRIS. PUT THE ROSE DOWN.
2) She believes in aliens.
CHRIS. RUN.
3) She says “I have a kid”.
CHRIS. FOR THE LOVE. PUT DOWN THE COTTON PICKIN’ ROSE and RUN.
Now let me be clear, he shouldn’t run because she has a kid…but he should run because of how she tells him she has a kid.
Because “I have a kid” was a direct quote.
Not “I have a son”, or “I have a little boy that has changed my life” or “I have a little man in my life that brings me so much joy.
Nope. “I have a kid.” She might as well have said “I have the pox.”
Chris then says he likes kids, which is good, because he appears to be dating one right now.
He gives the kid the rose.
And then the kid goes back to the house and proceeds to tell the girls how she made out with the farmer 5….no….6 times.
#rookiemistake
A 1:1 date card arrives at the house, and Megan gets it.
It says “Love is a Natural Wonder”.
And she plays stupid and acts like she doesn’t know it’s a date card.
I would like to go ahead and call bull corn on that.
They hop in a private plane and then in a helicopter and fly to the Grand Canyon.
They set up a picnic and Megan confides in Chris about her dad passing away just a short time ago.
And I find myself really worried about her being able to handle all this crazy because it is pretty clear that this girl is already head over heels. She’s head over heels for this guy who happens to still have around 20ish other girls that he’s dating.
Megan, I hope you don’t forget to guard and protect your heart.
#kaseywassowise
The next date card arrives and it says “Till Death Do Us Part.”
And every single girl whose name is called gives out a fake scream of excitement (while simultaneously dying inside that they aren’t getting a 1:1).
All the girls get shoved into a limo together and they pull up at what appears to be a ghost town.
A zombie’s face flashes in the window, and I’m pretty sure at least 1 girl peed her pants.
Or worse.
#checkyourpantiesgirls
So they find out that that they are going to shoot zombies with paint balls.
And #crazyeyes is psyched.
I think that maybe she’s done this before.
And I’m also thinking the zombies are the ones who should be afraid.
I’ve never wanted to play paintball with zombies,
But I promise you I would rather do this than ride a tractor in a bikini.
#nobrainer
Here’s what we know FOR SURE after this date.
#crazyeyesneedstobemedicated
Or wait.
Maybe she is over-medicated?
Whichever scenario is true, the girl is whack.
She disappears for a minute and then comes back to the group of girls mumbling something about “the truth” and “boom”.
And all the other girls are like “come again?”.
She then goes off to see Chris…and if you thought we were all confused as viewers…you should have seen Chris’s face. She was like talking in morse code and broken English.
And just like that, now I’ve moved from being annoyed by her to
being legitimately concerned for her.
MEDIC!
This scenario leads to rules 2 and 3.
Rule #2: Don’t do drugs.
Rule #3: Don’t mix prescription meds with alcohol.
I wanted to make sure we covered both recreational and prescription drugs, because drugs are clearly involved in this somehow.
Chris gets some 1:1 time with Kaitlyn.
She told him about how she lived in Germany for awhile with her last boyfriend, but there was no way she could live her whole life in Germany…I’m guessing an Iowa farm isn’t
high up on her list either. But Chris digs her.
Then he gets some 1:1 time with Britt.
And I’m officially on TEAM BRITT.
TEAM BRITT ALL DAY LONG AND TWICE ON SUNDAY.
Chris gives her a card that says “Free Kiss from Chris”, and then they mug down.
He gives the group date rose to Kailtyn.
Cut back to the house.
Jordan is D.R.U.N.K.
And I don’t mean just kind of drunk.
Please see the below picture where she is twerking upside down on a wall.
Girl is FULL BLOWN SOMEBODY TAKE AWAY HER DRINK AND GIVE HER A LOAF OF BREAD DRUNK.
Rule #4: Try your best to refrain from twerking on national t.v.
Again, just a good rule of thumb and what many people would think of as common sense.
Actually, let’s go ahead and just try to refrain from twerking period.
Rule #5: If you are unable to refrain from the twerking, perhaps you should put on a helmet to protect your brain from further injury, because the alcohol is already doing plenty of damage.
It’s time for the rose ceremony cocktail party.
And Ashley, the freelance journalist that we will henceforth refer to as #genieinabottle, talks about the fact she’s never had a boyfriend and is a virgin.
Part of me wants to call bull corn again.
And Mackenzie is super jealous because she thinks Prince Farming is going to be ALL OVER THAT.
Mackenzie then expresses her sadness that her dang kid has gotten in the way because he’s a “dead giveaway” (HER words, NOT mine) that she isn’t a virgin.
And we all collectively shook our heads in shame.
Okay, so #genieinabottle gets some alone time with Chris.
She shows him her belly button ring. And it’s a magic genie lamp.
And she tells him that he gets 3 wishes on her belly button ring throughout the course of the show.
He wishes for a kiss, and she makes him actually rub the belly button ring.
I felt all sorts of oogie watching the exchange.
And then they kiss, and she is aggressive as all get out.
#downgirl
If I could make the madness stop, I’d rub her lamp myself.
And now we see Jordan.
And sister is drunk again. Good choice Jordan. Just fight through the pain and have another drink.
Harrison comes in clinking his glass, and it’s time to hand out the roses!
And we all secretly hold our breaths until we get to see who bites it.
Who gets a rose?
Britt! Duh.
#genieinabottoe
Trina. Who?
Chelsea. Yay!
Samantha. Pretty.
Julia.
OH MY GOSH.
This is when Jillian comes forward EVEN THOUGH HE CALLED JULIA…
and then she trips.
Actually, she doesn’t trip, she more throws on the brakes when she realizes that he didn’t call her name, and then she basically rolls an ankle.
I wanted to die for her.
Seriously, I think this is one of the fist times in my life I haven’t laughed at somebody falling.
Instead, I cringed.
I looked away and scrunched my shoulders up by my ears.
And then I kind of looked at the t.v. out of the corner of my left eye and was almost more shy about her laughing afterwards than I was about the name mix-up or the fall.
It was painful to watch.
Here’s the other girls’ reactions to Jillian’s fall.
And is it me, or does it look like the girl in the white dress might have somehow orchestrated the whole thing with some Jedi mind powers.
More roses get handed out:
Amber. Ok.
Tracy. Again, who?
Jillian.
OH THANK GOD. Jillian got a rose!
Jade.
Nikki.
Becca.
Carly. (My name is Carly, it’s nice to meet you.)
Whitney. I like her whisper voice better than her normal voice. Good call Whitney.
#crazyeyes
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT????????
and
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
Whoever the producer is that insisted that Chris keep #crazyeyes around for a bit deserves a raise.
Who didn’t get roses?
Jordan.
I see tequila shots in her not so distant future.
Kimberly.
It’s her 2nd time in a row to not get a rose. Ouch. Seems like a sweet girl.
Kara.
I was quietly willing one of the camera crew to go give her a bear hug and tell her that everything was going to be okay and that she shouldn’t find her worth in a man.
That’s it for the 2nd episode girls.
I dare say it was FANTASTIC.
If you’re a Bachelor fan and are just now finding my blog today, click HERE to see the recap of the Season Premier.
Now before you go, I have two more things for you!
And I know I told you girls that I ended up returning the first coat I bought and ordering THIS one for myself online. And on Monday I was really hoping when it arrived that I’d love it.
WELL.
Imagine hearts circling my head.
GIRLS!
Click HERE.
THIS COAT IS ON SALE FOR $43.98!
Here I am in my new coat about 23 seconds after it arrived on my doorstep on Monday evening.
I was wearing a sweatshirt, UGGs, a hat, and zero make-up…..but look how DARLING the coat makes me look. The color is a vibrant navy blue (pics don’t do it justice), it has toggles, AND a faux fur hood! WHAT THE HECK IS NOT TO LOVE?
And I mean, let’s just be honest, this coat is magic.
Like I said before, I was wearing a hat and no make-up (and I hadn’t showered since the day before), but you wouldn’t have known any of that because of this coat. I’m telling you. DARLING.
For size reference, I got a medium.
SHOP MY PRE-SHOWER LOOK WITH THE COAT AND UGGs:
And here I am wearing it yesterday. After a shower. Because I’m hygienic like that.
SHOP THE POST-SHOWER LOOK WITH A RED TEE, A LEOPARD BELT, AND FRYE’S:
Also, I meant to include this poncho on Monday’s post, but I forgot.
And it has 28 5 STAR REVIEWS!
I really want a poncho, and I liked this one fine, but I didn’t love it.
I think I want mine to be more colorful.
Click HERE for the black and grey graphic poncho.
I’m wearing the MUST HAVE shirt HERE, the new MUST HAVE jeans HERE (click HERE for my post with a full review of the jeans!), the Ivanka Trump black boots (STILL ON SALE) HERE, earrings c/o Gorjana and Griffin at Nordstrom HERE, necklace c/o Gorgana and Griffin at Nordstrom HERE.
And here are some poncho options for you!
I’m really digging the bright and colorful one. Plus, I think I like that you pull the entire thing over your head. Seems like less to mess with.
All right girls, that’s all for today!
See you back here on Friday for a full post on Zella work out gear!
And let me just go ahead and put it out there that the fact that the Zella page says “Summer bodies are earned in the winter!” pretty much threw me into a full blown panic.
Onn Friday I’m going to be reviewing my new work out gear and talking about the GET HEALTHY plan that I’m about to embark on.
Pray for me.
xoxo,
Sheaffer 🙂
OH WAIT! I’VE GOT 3 OTHER THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW!
1)
These Northface fleeces are now 50% OFF, making them $27.49.
Chris got THIS from my parents for Christmas, and he loves it!
It’s very lightweight, but still warm! It comes in lots of colors and is a total steal at $27!
Click HERE!
2)
I can’t believe that they are still in stock, but click HERE for the Kate Spade silver glitter studs.
I was one of the lucky ones that got the multi-color, and I’ve worn them for 5 straight days in a row….which totally justifies me adding the silver to my closet too! 🙂
3)
Click HERE for 40% OFF NEW STYLES! (excluding Lou and Grey)
There are TONS of new great styles in fresh spring colors!
Click HERE for an additional 60% OFF of styles already on sale!
Dani {Adventures of a Pharm Girl} says
I would definitely not be going on either the tractor date or the zombie date haha but some how you made them both sound HILARIOUS as usual! Happy Wednesday !
xoxo
Erika Slaughter says
Eek!!! Loved this!! My favorite part was the girl using her Jedi powers!!! LOL! Ooh! Does this workout plan have you at the gym?? It'd be so fun!!!
Whitney and Blaire says
I found myself asking out loud several times during the show, "Is she drunk?" I am concerned at the amount of liver damage that is happening during this season, and yes I felt so sorry for the tractor girls. Yikes!
xo, Whitney and Blaire
Peaches In A Pod
Narci says
Oh my goodness!! So, so funny! And, my word–I feel for that poor girl who misheard her name and then rolled her ankle. So embarrassing!! Hilarious recap, friend!!
Terrie Mathison says
Oh my I LOVE YOUR RECAP! I stopped watching the Bachelor long ago because of the risky interactions and the cringing. You have a fabulous eye and way with words to make me laugh and really enjoy the recaps. Does your husband watch with you? I'd love to know his thoughts too. Thanks!
Sheaffer says
Thanks Terrie! My hubby sometimes watches with me, but this week he was watching the National Championship game, so we were in 2 different rooms! And it ended up working really well for me, because I was able to stop and start it and write as the show went on. It might have to be a new thing. 🙂 xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂
Caitlin says
Hi Sheaffer! Normally I don't comment, I am a silent reader (and lover) of this blog! However, two things compelled me to reach out today. 1) Hilarious recap.. like rolling on the floor laughing hilarious, because I was thinking everything you wrote as I watched this weeks episode (I also had my shoulders scrunched up to my ears and could hardly look at the TV out of pure embarrassment for most of these girls)! 2) I thought about your blog this morning on my way out the door because I remember reading another readers comment about wearing brown and black. And I have one word to say about wearing brown and black together… AMEN! In addition to that, navy and gray!? PREACH! The reason I thought about it this morning is because I was wearing my navy suit and gray sweater… with (GASP!) nude shoes. I tied in the "nude shade" if you will, with a gold necklace and another shocker..I mixed and matched my metals. Yes, I was wearing navy, gray, nude, silver AND gold.. and I must say.. it looked fabulous! I got several comments as I walked into the office today. Happy Wednesday to you! Thanks for providing me some comic relief and as always, fantastic fashion advice! xox
Sheaffer says
Caitlin, I'm ALL OVER IT. Navy and Grey is totally gorgeous and chic together. And I ALWAYS mix my metals. If I have on a silver watch, then my bracelets are definitely gold! The two of us are soul sisters. Keep on mixin'! xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂
Kim says
Love the recaps. Iam with you on laughing when people fall.. SOmehow it just cracks me up.. Have a good day..
Sallie says
So glad you like the plaid coat, because mine comes today!
Hysterical post. Your recaps are the best part of watching the Bachelor!!
Jersey Love says
Couldn't agree more with the not zipped up hoodie… DYING over the shoe choices paired with their bikinis… The two girls B&E at Chris' house was epic for so many reasons…the black box booty, the helmet head continuously knocking her head into things. Noses & Aliens with the 'kid' needs a serious reality check! I was BLOWN AWAY that she got that rose and then proceeded to brag like a 7th grader about kissing him. #CrazyEyes killed me this episode…I think she's half vampire. What's with her and "boom" omg so weird. I couldn't even. I couldn't figure out if she was on drugs or drunk or both… Maybe she got bit by a vampire #wewillneverknow. Genie in a bottle almost ate Chris's face…. I was worried for a minute there… I have to admit I felt bad for cowgirl at the end… But all in all – loved your recap. Couldn't agree more!! I made my husband watch and he is hooked now Woo! Haha
clatk says
Oh.my.word. I don't think I have ever cringed and wanted to hide under the couch during a Bachelor episode as much as I did during this one. And I have watched A LOT of Bachelor episodes. What is going on with these women? It is clear that having 30 girls allowed them to flat out bring on the crazy girls. Jordan, Mackenzie and oh, Megan. She and Jordan need to exit the show and head straight to Rehab. So concerning!! Thanks for your recap– HYSTERICAL!!
Megan says
These are hysterical!!! This made my whole morning! My two year old, Hudson, has been looking at me with #crazyeyes wondering why I am laughing! 😉 Please can I come watch the Bachelor with you?? Happy Wednesday!
Paula says
That was a total loLOUD post. Love it!
Anonymous says
Hilarious recap! I stopped watching the show for a few seasons but decided to watch again and I'm so glad I did. This season has been so funny so far. I also tend to laugh when people fall down. So when Jillian fell, I laughed and cringed at the same time. I was kind of freaking out. And then I rewinded it and watched it again 😛
Donna Simpson says
Loved your recap! This season is going to give you lots of good material. Here's a question my husband and I are always wondering and since you're friends with Shay maybe you have some insider information. 🙂 We always wonder if the Bachelor or Bachelorette has any say in where they go on the dates and who goes on the date. Or is all decided by the producers? I'm hoping and assuming that the activities are producers choice because the zombie and tractor ride dates were two of the worst I've seen on bachelor and I really like Chris so far… Although I also can't figure out why in the world he kept Mackenzie.
Sheaffer says
Hi Donna! If I remember correctly, the Bachelor/Bachelorette is definitely asked where he/she would like to go on the trips. Not that they necessarily end up there, but they try to make it happen. I think the producers think up all of the smaller dates. And if memory serves me, they get to pick their 1:1 dates, but the producers group the girls together for the group dates! xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂
Libby Gordon says
Oh my gosh, great recap! This WAS a cringe-ful episode. I'm going to reach through the tv and ZIP UP THAT HOODIE for him or at least throw him a white t-shirt if he does that again; I hate the outside shower scenes too. I was sad to see Jordan go but hoping she checks into rehab,. Her hair was hilarious at the cocktail party. At least he kept Crazy Eyes ("I would never shoot a person" #yeahright) .
Marty says
I haven't watched the bachelor since Sean Lowe's season. Sometimes even the previews for the show make my head numb (Think Rules #1 and #1b) (OhhhhhMYWORD). No thanky. I think I'll just read your re-caps instead. HILARIOUS! Thanks for making me laugh this morning!
Liz/ says
I mean….I just can't even handle these recaps, HILARIOUS and best part of watching this show. I was dying reading this…..so spot on with every single thing that happened this week. It's all sorts of crazy but man has it made for some good tv!!!
live compassionately says
Oh my word – I am DYING! You are so funny! I love that you said #byefelicia! Hahaha! Thanks for an entertaining start to my day!
Gavan says
Dying here! ? And I have the same 'quirk' about laughing when people trip, fall , etc……just can't help it, it's my first reaction!! ?
Melody
Jenny says
Bahahaha!!!! "Jedi mind powers"… you nailed that one! 🙂 So funny! Thanks for the laugh this morning.
Shawnee says
LOVE the Bachelor recaps….hilarious!!!!!!!!!!
And I may or may not have ordered 4 of the North Face pullovers, 2 for hubby and 2 for my 14yr old son.
Anonymous says
You are so funny! Loved the recap and agree with you on all of it. I was so confused about Megan because he liked her on the date but she was so weird with the helmet and seemed really dumb in that clip. Also I was cracking up at you and the coat and the whole shower thing.
Unknown says
Oh my goodness I love your recaps! Do. You feel like this is the dumbest crop (lol, I crack myself up) ever? Full blown crazy and not smart!
I have to add your recaps are so great, I read another recap and it was terrible. Not funny and straight up rude. I. Was actually slightly offended reading it. How does that work? I not offended easily.
Katie A.
Anonymous says
When people fall I laugh too! You are not alone! I don't know why but I think it's hilarious!
Darcy says
I was sooo bored during this entire episode I didn't even watch the last half hour, whoops! Also, last week when you aid Andi and Josh were done I totally thought "no way that is not happening" and then later it came out they broke up.HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT hahaha!
http://www.amemoryofus.com
Anonymous says
I LOVE your Bachelor recaps….your observations are spot on! At this point (and mind you, we're just at episode 2), I'm having extreme difficulty (tremors, really) picturing this group of crazies in other countries and cities – could set foreign relations back a few hundred years!
Doused In Pink says
Your recaps are hilarious and so spot on! I've only had time to watch 1/2 of this episode so I didn't read through who got the roses!
Jill
Doused In Pink
Farris Family says
I am on the floor dying!!!!
Jill Sloothaak says
I can't even find the words to tell you how happy it made me that you referenced Kasey in this post. I was DYING.
🙂
April says
Oh so funny!! I couldn't WAIT for this post!
Stacey says
This post had me cracking up! Thanks for the laughs.
Sarah says
I absolutely love your recaps, I look forward to them every bachelor and bachelorette season. I don't watch them every week, but when I do I feel like I"m all caught up reading your recap. Thanks!
Ali Laner says
One of the funniest recaps I have ever read! So great!
Tessa Stow says
Dying…I had a few min. while my kids were testing today. I just clicked on your blog and was happy to see you had your recap up. My poor students probably thought I was having an episode while I was trying to contain my laughter…shaking body, tears rolling, the whole bit! LOVE LOVE LOVE your recaps!!! Thanks so much!!!
Kendra C says
I literally cracked up the ENTIRE TIME reading this recap. My toddler thinks I've officially lost it. HILARIOUS….also I am so glad I wasn't the only one who noticed how Mackenzie brought up her son but I guess it really shows that she is a kid with a kid.
hannahsmithlifestyle says
OHHHH my word, Sheaffer! You almost made me spit out my tea this morning because I was laughing so hard at your recap!!! I felt like the crazy one this morning, laughing uncontrollably at 5:30am. You were RIGHT ON. Your ability to articulate the craziness of Monday night is exactly what I was thinking in my head. I'm glad I am not the only one rooting for #crazyeyes to stay a few more weeks…can't wait to see what she does NEXT! Thanks for starting off my day of with a little sparkle!
P.S. I wore my leopard belt in honor of you!!
Katherine says
Shaeffer. Oh Shaeffer! I have read your blog since about the beginning and I have found love in many must haves, and I have emailed and commented periodically… I love reading. But oh my word this post is hands down my favorite of yours! I laughed so so hard. When Jillian fell I laughed so hard and then rewound it and recorded it on my phone and sent it to my husband at work. Hah. Love your blog, love your recaps, and love you! Can't wait for next week!
Blue-Eyed Bride says
I am cackling! So so so funny! And I loved Megan. She was so sweet and affectionate and complimentary – I know Chris was all over that! Anyway- you make me laugh! So funny!
Natalie McKinney says
I think I look more forward to your recaps than actually watching the show. I also want to thank you for your new must have jeans post. Got mine in the mail today and they are my new favorite pair!! Thanks so much!
Stephanie Jennings says
Hilarious, as always!! I read that ABC may have blocked out the girl's bikini to make us think something wasn't right, but it actually fit fine. Crazy, right?? Love your recaps 🙂
Sarah Shaneyfelt says
Ashley S = PYSCHO!!!! I was dying at the scene in the limo where she was just trying to get out all normal and stuff and at the zombie paintball scene where she just walked straight through everything. She needs some major help and I hope the producers realize that and get her the help she needs (while she entertains American with her #crazyeyes)
Maggie C. says
I'm just watched this episode tonight (bc I was watching my Buckeyes win the National Championship on Monday night!!) and I couldn't wait to read your recap! This episode was so full of crazy and everything you wrote was pretty much what we were all thinking. Hilarious! Loved this!
Olivia says
I just bought that coat (I really needed a new one). My January goal was to wait 24 hours before purchasing an item to see if I really wanted it. Fail. I couldn't resist the sale. And your commentary of The Bachelor is just as good as the actual show! Hilarious!
Dana Vissage says
Sheaffer! SPOT ON, girlfriend! I am dying!!
KellyinPA says
I have never seen an episode of the Bachelor and never intend to. Those girls………………they are somebody's daughters and if it were my daughter. Well, I can't even. But, that said, I do enjoy your recaps;) Thank you for bringing a smile to my face this morning.
Anonymous says
HYSTERICAL!!! I was laughing out loud multiple times which made my teenage son question what I was reading?? You nailed this episode on the head. I love your sense of humor. Looking forward to your next recap.
Maureen from Long Island, NY
Betsy Hensley says
I loved your recap, but I'm wondering if you read the I hate green beans recap prior to writing yours? They're very similar.
Sheaffer says
Hi Betsy! I LOVE that blog (a reader told me about it a couple of years ago after I started writing recaps)! And I do read it, but not until after I write my own recap. I never want it to "color" how I write mine. I hadn't had a chance to read hers yet this week, but after receiving your comment I went to go check it out. We did talk about several of the same things, but I think a lot of those things were obvious things to talk about after watching the show! I'm guessing most Bachelor blogs all touch on the same topics. The main similarity I saw was us talking about the "NO RULES" thing. I actually had a reader e-mail be about this weeks show (lots of people do), and she went on and on about the no rules, and we had a really funny back and forth conversation about it. I have to say, I had already started writing my recap when we had the e-mail exchange, and then I went back and wrote several "rules" jokes per our conversation. After reading Lincee's blog this morning, I think It's possible that maybe the reader had read her blog post already? Because like I said, I hadn't focused on the "no rules" thing until our e-mail. Anyway, thanks for your question and allowing me to respond! xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂
Wish U.S Were Here says
Hahaha! That was pure gold! We get it a little later here, so I beg of you.. No spoilers in the heading (which there wasn't, thank you!!) 🙂
Wendy Woodall says
You're adorable! Just discovered your blog and wanted to say hi!
Renae says
I haven't watched the Batchlor in awhile but after reading your recap, I just might start back. This was the funniest and best recap!!
Jennifer G. says
Two things:
1. It's Jueleiea or some other jacked up spelling, not Julia, like one would think. Just fyi.
2. Why in the world didn't Chris just let Jillian take the rose she thought was hers if he was going to call her name anyway??! Or at least, ss soon as she fell, he should have comforted her with a "Don't worry, I'm giving you one too!!" Instead of making her sweat it out! I'm just sayin….
Chic Coastal Living says
You hit the nail on the head with that recap! I'm dying over here! LOL!!!!!!!
MorganizewithMe says
I sooo enjoy your recaps of the show…you nail ever crazy part of it. That shot of the girls walking in their bikins and boots….abc really?!?