After a season of dreading basically every single episode, I was actually giddy with anticipation about The Women Tell All.
Bless My Heart.
WHAT A LETDOWN.
RIGHT?
I mean, were you guys as bored as I was?
Nobody gave me much of anything to work with, and I’m having to dig really deep to find the funny.
And I’m sad to report I’m not sure I ever did…find the funny that is.
So please, if you have any funny observations, DO SHARE.
Before the show gets started, Sean and Catherine come out for a quick little visit.
And Catherine is ROCKIN’ SOME BANGS.
She’s DARLING with the bangs.
In fact, she makes me want bangs.
Oh wait.
I have bangs.
She makes me glad I have bangs.
Harrison brings up the wedding night, and Catherine said “it was very romantic, there were rose petals, we were looking at each others rings…”
Sean interrupted and said “FIREWORKS!”
Hilarious!
Well, Catherine didn’t take a 1/2 a beat before she said “QUICK FIREWORKS.”
Sean was a GREAT sport about that, and I thought they just looked really cute and happy together.
After Sean and Catherine, there was a deal with Harrison and Huhwahn doing a little thing with Miss Piggy and Kermit.
Don’t ask me why, I have no idea.
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I never did and I still don’t like the muppets.
Actually, it’s mainly Miss Piggy that I don’t like. That pig pushes my buttons.
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Kat was tan. REALLY tan. And she likes to talk. A lot.
And she’s doing this thing with her hair that Lori from Shark Tank does.
Like the hair is severely swooped TO ONE SIDE ONLY and stays put over 1 shoulder.
Is it fastened somehow with a barrette?
Do styling products make it stay put?
I’m confused by it.
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I was SUPER impressed with Sharleen, and Mama.
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The Dog Lover also likes to talk. A lot.
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Several of the women took issue with the fact that Huhwahn called Mama and Cassandra his “special ones” since they had children.
Several of the other girls were all,
“I mean, I don’t have a child, but why am I not special?”
“I want to be special.”
“I left stuff at home too.”
“I want to be special.”
“Why didn’t you think I was special?”
“I want to be special.”
AHHHHHH!
GIRLS!
IT’S NOT THE SAME THING!
You leaving a job IS NOT THE SAME THING as a mother leaving her child.
And he wasn’t saying they were more special than you, he was saying that he was going to give them special consideration and make sure he didn’t keep them longer than necessary BECAUSE HE DIDN’T FEEL IT WAS FAIR TO KEEP THEM AWAY FROM THEIR CHILDREN.
Understand?
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Some girl that was kicked off the first show still wanted answers for the fact that she felt like she had been wronged.
PUH-LEEZ.
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There were 15 girls there, and 13 of them proved the following saying:
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I actually liked Huhwahn MORE by the end of the night that I did when the episode started, and I was NOT expecting that.
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One more thing before we start the show, my greatest disappointment from last night was the fact that
MY MAN, CHRIS HARRISON, didn’t get a chance to shine.
I always love Chris, but I’ve said it before, I love him THE MOST on Women Tell All specials.
It’s typically where he does his finest work.
He asks the questions we all want answers to, but he does it in a completely friendly and non-judgmental way (even though it is totally obvious that he is judging). It’s genius.
I’m telling you, the entire episode was just kind of BLEH.
Not even Harrison could turn it around.
So….let’s get to it….
Here’s a quick peak of the ladies right after they got out on the stage, all looking FINE.
(Although there were a couple of eyebrow issues. But we’ll get to that later.)
Right out of the box, their little fannies had barely even hit the stools, and they were all doggin’ Huhwahn HARD.
They were all taking over each other, and it was incredibly annoying.
And I didn’t feel like anything they were saying was valid.
I mean, I was never Huhwahn’s biggest fan by any stretch of the imagination, but most of the girls last night were just appearing a tad pathetic. Sorry, I said it.
I think they were just proving his point that he was being honest with him.
HAVE SOME PRIDE GIRLS.
Seeing Kat made me go ahead and press purchase on THIS new sunless tanner that’s been HIGHLY recommended to me by a reader (thanks Denise!).
I had recommended to Denise to go buy the tan towels that I love, but when she went to Nordstrom to buy them, the sales girl talked her into THIS lotion instead.
It’s pricey, but Denise went out on a limb and called it a Must Have after using it for a weeek. 🙂
Ha! It’s on it’s way to me as I type this, and I can’t wait to try it!
Sorry for the self tanner aside, but I’m telling you, that’s the most exciting thing
you are going to read here today.
By the way, I felt like Kat was auditioning for Hollywood.
Any roll will do, but she definitely has Hollywood on the brain.
Sharleen was first up in the hot seat.
I wasn’t a fan of the earrings, but the eye make-up was GORG.
And the eyebrows were ……….well, I’m not really sure what adjective I should use to describe them.
They were IN CHARGE.
Sharleen said saying good-bye was hard, but she knows it was the right decision.
She said some nice things about Huhwahn and she can walk about town with her head held high.
High Five Sharleen.
Thanks for representing.
Kat and Dog Lover (not to be confused with Cat and Dot lovers) both pointed lots of fingers.
Both of them annoyed me.
Everybody say it with me,
GIRLS! He’s Just Not That Into You!
Now pack up the bitter and MOVE ON.
Now, let’s take a quick minute to talk about the audience members.
I’m so thankful for them. The audience shots were the only things that had me laughing this show.
I MEAN, these girls are into it, and I’m feeling like they are maybe all teetering on the edge of WACKADOODLE.
Just look at the utter disbelief plastered on all of their faces.
Nothing happened last night that warranted this type of disbelief.
This girl is appalled APPALED I SAY about something.
I can’t imagine what though. I was appaled by nothing.
If I would have been in the audience, they probably would have captured a shot of me getting in a quick nap. I really do love a power nap. I wake up feeling all sorts of refreshed.
I think this next lady might be my favorite.
She looks like she wants to eat Huhwahn Pablo with a spoon.
And I like how the girl in blue looks like she is giving somebody on the stage a piece of her mind.
And the blonde girl is all like “Oh really? Yeah, sure.”
Mama was up next.
She admitted that she had fallen in love with him, but she now seems to be MORE than over him.
And word has it on the streets that Mama is engaged! YAY Mama!!!!
LOVE. HER.
Andi’s turn.
The make-up girl that did Sharleen’s eyebrows took a turn at Andi’s too.
Andi re-hashes why she felt like she was wronged again.
ANDI – everybody say it with me – HE JUST WASN’T THAT INTO YOU.
She brings up again how she can’t believe that he shared with her that he had already been to the fantasy suite with Clare.
Andi.
Believe it.
You knew what you signed up for.
Time to move on.
(I hear that she’s the next Bachelorette. Not super excited about that.)
I know that Emily Maynard is engaged, but I would LOVE to see her again. Wouldn’t you?
Or Jillian.
Loved me some Jillian and Emily.
In fact, wouldn’t we all like to be friend’s with Jillian and Emily?
Shay (who obviously got to meet Emily and LOVED her) texted me last week telling me to check out Emily’s blog for an awesome message about God’s presence in her life.
Boy was Shay right. It was soooo good.
Here’s a little snippit of Emily’s words:
For so many years I have questioned why He would bring me through something like The Bachelor and eventually The Bachelorette, knowing all along I would meet my husband through church just a few miles from my house. Couldn’t He have spared me so much heartbreak and humiliation?
I have gone through many storms in my life, only to have God bring me through to the other side and now was my chance to give Him all the glory. I have been so caught up in worrying about my past and trying to move forward, that I didn’t even realize that He had already brought me through.
Good stuff!
Click HERE to see the blog post and a link to a video of her speaking at her church!
OKAY.
It’s time for Huhwahn, he walks out, and the audience actually claps for him.
At this point I’m definitely not Team Huhwahn. (like these ladies)…but things do end up turning around for me.
Huhwahn says he has “no regrets”.
The girl from the first episode immediately pops in again with something to say (she spoke several times before he came out), and I’m like WHO ARE YOU?
Everybody starts hurling accusations at Huhwahn.
I’m guessing Huhwahn wasn’t on the debate team in high school.
Sharleen actually defended him very eloquently on this point, but from the look on his face I’m not sure Huhwahn understood what she was saying.
I hope explains it to him and that he sends her a thank-you note.
All of the women need to take a page from Sharleen’s and Mama’s books.
Those ladies were CLASS ACTS.
(Andi wasn’t bad either, but I was most impressed with Sharleen and Mama.)
And to wrap up the Women Tell All Recap, I found this and thought it was appropriate for the scorned woman theme.
And if the previews are accurate (WHICH HELLO? DO WE BELIEVE ANYTHING WE SEE ON BACHELOR PREVIEWS ANYMORE? THE ANSWER IS NO.),
it’s going to be a SHOCKING final episode.
Whatever.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me like 23 times, shame on me.
So, I’m just going to go ahead and say it.
I don’t believe you Harrison.
I do NOT believe it’s going to be the most dramatic rose ceremony ever.
Nikki is probably crying because she lost a contact or something, and Clare is probably crying because her sweet sister Laura (wink wink) sent her a tacky e-mail just letting her know that she and mama still weren’t supporting her. Just because.
Still, I’m going to stick it out.
We’re in the home stretch girls.
WE CAN DO THIS!
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Okay, MOVING ON from The Women Tell All…
My hubby forwarded me an e-mail last night that he got,
and can I just say that I’ve never loved him more.
The e-mail included the newest DESIGNER sale items at Nordstrom.
He must have had a moment of weakness before sending it to me.
Click HERE to shop the entire sale.
Look down the left sidebar for all categories (women’s, men’s, juniors, kids, etc.)
Y’all!.
LOTS of amazing deals to be had. (Some designer, some regular ol’ deals) 🙂
NEW SALE ITEMS
marc jacobs crossbody HERE for 50% off!
michael kors heeled sandal HERE
michael kors gold watch HERE
michael kors silver presley watch HERE
leopard sperry’s HERE
kate spade striped tote HERE
paige jeans HERE
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One more thing before you go...
A NEW BLOG FEATURE
Now, before you go, I want to introduce you all to a new feature on the blog!
You might have been seeing this on instagram for awhile now, but now it’s going to be on the blog too, and I’m super excited about it!
It’s called:
subscription program that does exactly what it says it does.
Here’s a breakdown of how to use it:
1) Register:
If those three things are found, that means that when you like the photo, the shopable items seen will be sent to your email.
3) Shop!
Here’s one little helpful hint.
One thing I would suggest doing after you initially sign up is unliking @liketkit on instagram. If you don’t, the pictures that @liketkit puts out will show up in your feed to. Pictures of people you don’t know or follow. However, if you unlike @liketkit, you will still be signed up for the service, and your inbox won’t be flooded with random pictures!
AND…not only can you see the pictures on intagram, I’ve also added them onto my blog.
Click HERE to see the “SHOP MY INSTAGRAMS” tab. You will be able to ALWAYS find it right above the date of my most recent post on the top left hand side of the blog.
You can also refer to the top right portion of my right sidebar for my most recent
shoppable instagram pic. Again, click HERE for another example.
So please, take a minute to click around and get familiar with it!
I’m sooooooo excited about this new feature and I hope you are too!
Mix and Match Mama says
How have we never discussed the Muppets before? I hate them. Well…hate is a strong word. I really dislike them and I don't understand anyone over the age of 3 wanting to talk to them. Ever. They annoy me. We need to discuss this. Call me. 😉
Anonymous says
I only watch The Bachelor now so I can come here and read your wrap up on Wednesdays!! You have me rolling, and I always totally agree with your thoughts…What bothered me about the girls (other than their obvious malice) was their blush! Poor Mama, her beautiful face was overtaken by vicious streaks of bronzer…Love your blog
Alaleh says
Commentary today was SPOT on!!! Couldn't agree with you more 😉 love me some Juan pabs despite the show and media turning on him…and I went from not liking sharleen to becoming a big fan of hers!
Tab & Erika says
I think you did it!! You managed to find some funny when you said there was none!!! 🙂
Narci says
How have we not known this about each other??? The muppets make me cringe. Always. Just another reason why I love you, girls! 🙂
Jen says
You nailed it, Shaeffer. When one of the ladies was complaining that even though e single moms left their children, ALL of them left there entire lives! Blah blah, and my husband goes, "well, except dog lover. She brought her babies." I love my guy. He is a keeper!
Cheryl says
Interesting……I did not come away from that Tell All liking JP at all…..I was frustrated….he doesn't seem to answer anything….it's like he has a set thing he is going to say, no matter what is said to him….does that make sense?….I mean I totally agree that lots of the girls complaining had no right to complain…he wasn't into them, nuf said…….I felt like Kat was auditioning to be The Bachelorette….according to Reality Steve, Andi already knew when they filmed that, she was the next Bachelorette….I guess Kat didn't get the memo…ha, ha….of course, knowing that Andi knew that, also sort of maybe colors her answers for me, and clearly Chris saying do you still believe in love….and her saying yes!!!……the one girl saying she came to America from a different country, didn't speak english until 15 so don't use that language barrier as an excuse…..I totally agree with….feel like he likes to revert to that as a defense….Not sad to see this season end, it has been anything but interesting…..Sean and Catherine were so cute….love her bangs!!!!
Hayley Chandler says
Loved your recap!!! Totally agree Mama and Sharleen were class acts!
Elaine Welte says
I did not like Sharleen during the season. But, she totally turned me last night! I thought was gorgeous and so classy! Mama was fabulous as always!
Alison @ Get Your Pretty On says
Those designer sales at Nordstrom are killer!!! Now if I could just set aside and save some of my spring budget instead of blowing all of it on scarves, we'd be in business. 🙂
Kim R says
Shaeffer – thanks for the Bachelor Women Tell All! I didn't watch this season (even though I've watched ever season since number uno). I just am not "into" Huhwuan like I was with the others, so I am living vicariously through your hilarious posts! Thank you for pointing out the audience members – they are awesome!
I used to work with a gal who was one a few seasons back and she echos your love for Harrison – says he's a super nice guy (her friend knows him in real life and got the tix to the show). Sad he wasn't up to his usual digging because of the girls this season!
And lastly – love your fashion advice. Makes me push the limits of my wardrobe and then justify shopping trips!
Christy says
Something is just not right about Harrison this season, not very present in the episodes, very little counseling with JP, lackluster questioning for the WTA episode. I don't know why he is less of a presence, but I miss him. Maybe he's over this "ahmazing" process.
JP is still skeezy and the girls are whiners. Just not that into any of them! Hats off to all the ladies, except one, for the lack of drunkenness this season. It just occurred to me, that could be why it's been so boring!!! Maybe Harrison's been hitting the Bachelor mansion bar out of boredom and CAN'T be the sound papa bear presence he once was. It's a possibility…
Amy Lawrence says
I agree with this and was hoping other people saw a lot of bitterness on a couch with two classy ladies.
kristinwithani says
Love, love, love Renee and I'm so happy for her.
Andi as the B-ette? Sigh. Another boring season. I like her but don't want to see her in that role.
Dog girl. My word, be quiet.
The side-hair thing. Lots of the girls had it. That would drive me batty.
Did you read Jillian Harris' post after Monday night? Good perspective from someone who has been there. Clear and logical.
And, Chris Harrison. You are so right. He's very quick on his feet so when he can ask unscripted questions, he's stellar. I know they edited out a lot. Would love to see the outtakes of the WTA episode.
On that train, the outtakes were my favorite. Worth my wasted time watching the whole show.
Mollie says
Love your recaps! I have to mention since you showed the crowd reactions that my friend was at the taping. They taped all of the crowd reaction shots BEFORE the ladies even came out! They had them all do surprise faces, laughing shots, disbelief, etc. then added them in to the show later. Craziness!
Liz/happymommy says
I so agree with you on the WTA episode…..it was totally boring BUT by the end of it I did like Huhwahn more than ever before. The women were all bat sh** crazy except for Mama and Sharleen, definetly class acts. I just love both of them, well I actually never really cared much for Sharleen on the season but she was so normal on the WTA and seemed very genuine! The dog lover chick and chick who was always naked made me crazy…they just had nothing of substance to say and were just SO annoying. The people in the audience HAVE to be told to make those faces cause really, there was nothing on that show that should have caused them to look like that AT ALL. Loved seeing Sean and Catherine….her comment had me dying but Sean did take it like a champ! They are just so cute and I agree, she is rocking those bangs! Can't wait for another of the MOST DRAMATIC episodes ever….paleeese I say! Not sure I am on board with Andi being the next Bachelorette but I'm sure I'll warm up to the idea when her season starts!
Laurie S says
I guess I'm in the minority – I DO LIKE the Muppets (of course I grew up with Sesame Street and The Muppet Show). However, I do find Miss Piggy annoying/narcissistic a lot of the time. I'm not watching this season's of The Bachelor – Juan Pablo just seems so dull and boring, especially following Sean's season(s) on the shows! Juan Pablo's ridiculous-ness seems more amusing….
April Parrish says
I also dislike the Muppets, by youngest daughter wants to go see the movie—Pray for me!!!
The best part of this bachelor women tell all was Sean and Catherine dropping by and Catherine's comment about those, "quick fireworks." LOL!!!!
There was definitely something going on with Sharleen's eyebrows—what in the world! She is so classy and sophisticated, but she needs to work on those eyebrows. They were all over the place!
Have a great day!
Tiffany {A Touch of Grace} says
Those designer sales are the best! Such good items. I think I NEED them all. 🙂
And yes, the Muppets make me shudder. Dislike greatly.
And I agree with you on Mama and Sharleeen. They are class acts.
Anonymous says
You are so right on about The Muppets–can NOT stand them. Ugh! What were the producers thinking when they decided do that clip with Chris H and Huhwhan Pablo?! This WTA was verrry boring compared to others. Can't figure out if next week is going to be dramatic or not, but I am curious to see who Huhwhan picks (in other words who loses). I just don't see how dating/being engaged to Huhwhan is something to be all that thrilled about. Was great to see Sean and Catherine interact at the beginning, and the out-takes at the end made me laugh a little…so the 1 1/2 hrs was not a complete waste of time!
Kathy Lang
{Hi Sugarplum!} says
Fast fireworks…hahahah. #illbet
great recap…thank you for saving me 2 hrs of my evening!
Mely says
Hi! I came to your blog from Mix and Match Mama and let me tell you I love love love your Bachelor recaps.. I just laughed out loud in my work cubicle. Keep them coming 😀
Chic Coastal Living says
I agree with everything you said! I mean he wasn't attracted to many of those girls and they're saying he should have asked questions. Well if he's not into you why bother. I was so annoyed with most of those girls except for mama and sharleen. And Andi was so whiny the whole time she is lucky she made it that far. Anyway it's good to vent! thanks for listening! XO
Christina says
Thank you for sharing the link to Emily's blog. Did you watch the whole video she posted? So moving!
Mary Louis Quinn says
SO agree with you on the recap! I was "recapping" with my coworker yesterday b/c she didn't see the episode, and I said the same thing about liking Juan more after that. Crazy, b/c he totally gets on my nerves, but those girls would not let it go. I feel like they got all fired up after watching the episodes but had nothing to complain about from the time they were actually there. So ready for this season to be OVA!
Liz/happymommy says
I just read online that Huhwahny P still lives at home with his parents, made me laugh!!! Bet the girl who "loses" will be SO happy to move in with the whole fam bam!!!
Bethany says
Ummmm this is my first time here, and I see immediately that you should pursue a career in Bachelor commentary. Omg. The WTA was SO boring, and I agree with you 100% on everything here. Esp. Sharleen and her in-charge eyebrows. That muppet segment made me cry a little, because I knew the Bachelor was going (gone) downhill, but I didn't realize how far. I want Sharleen to be the next B-rette, not Andi! Boo!
Dianna says
At times during the season Mama reminded me of a tan Kate Middleton. Anyone else see it?
mel @ the larson lingo says
WTA was a snooze fest. I was seriously nodding off. Sharlenn is GORGEOUS. A little odd…but beautiful. And, I agree with you….love Mama!! Totally ready for this season to be over. Love your commentary, wish we lived closer & could watch it together!!!!
Kelsey Long says
I love your recap!! I have to admit, I couldn't stop staring at Sharleen's eyebrows either, but I kind of thought they were amazing! Thanks for sharing that new tanning lotion. I use tan towels as well, but I'm always looking for new things to try!
xo
Kelsey
http://www.excusemyblog.com