WELL, LADIES…THE TIME HAS FINALLY COME. IT’S BACHELOR SEASON AGAIN!
#cuethepartyhorns #andthecrazygirls #andthedolphinssharks
For those of you that are new here, I’ve been doing Bachelor Recaps since Emily Maynard’s season because that’s when Sean was on, and Sean is one of my besties‘ brothers! Click HERE if you want to scroll through some of my Bachelor recaps of yesteryear. Click HERE to scroll through old Bachelorette recaps.
So this year we get to follow Nick on his journey to true love. Let’s take a moment to walk down memory lane and refresh ourselves on who Nick is. In a nutshell….#controversial #badboy #punk. Yep, that about does it.
His first appearance on the bachelor franchise was when Andi was The Bachelorette, and he received The First Impression Rose. Throughout the season, HE FELL HARD for Andi. But then Andi broke it off with him, which broke his heart, and he swore he would never do anything like that again. #neversayneverNick
After Andi’s season, he ticked lots of guys off when he showed up on Kaitlin’s season several episodes after it started. He fell hard. Again. In fact, he made it till the final two and started going down on one knee to propose in the finale….but Kaitlyn was all, “I like somebody else more.” #poornick #badboysneedlovetoo
Then he decided to mix it up, and he went on Bachelor in Paradise. I don’t remember the details, but even though he and some girl did like each other for a bit, they did not end up together in the end. I do remember liking him more on BIP and thinking that maybe he wasn’t such a bad guy!
And then…in THE MOST DRAMATIC BACHELOR ANNOUNCEMENT EVER (lol)….the producers pulled the rug out from under Bachelor Nation. Although everybody thought that the new bachelor was going to be Luke Pell (huhmuhnuh huhmuhnuh)……….they did an ol’ switcheroo and announced Nick Viall as their next leading man. #gasp
And Bachelor Nation was all….
You know my girl Ashley had to make an appearance. I’m sorry, but that face will NEVER get old.
The show opened to Nick admitting that he was as surprised as we are that he is The Bachelor. And then he listed some silly areas that he needs to improve on that he’s noticed from other seasons…like mumbling when he’s talking (which he totally does), covering his mouth when talking (which again, he totally does), and wearing skinny jeans too much (I might have added that one myself). But he’s self deprecating and charming….and I realize we’re only 10 minutes in, but I’m liking him a lot! I’m gonna consider that a win. #gonick
Before meeting the ladies, he met up with some former contestants for some advice. That’s Prince Farming (Chris Soules), Nick (haven’t thought of a good nickname yet), The Golden Boy (Sean Lowe), and Peter Brady (Ben Higgins). They were all giving him a really hard time, and I found myself feeling protective of Nick. WHAT IS HAPPENING. I also found myself scratching my head, questioning why Chris Souls was chosen to give advice. I also found myself questioning his hairstyle, but that’s neither here nor there. (You can’t tell in this picture, but the top portion was really long and did a weird swoopy thingy. #nosir)
After the meet up with the guys, the viewing audience got the chance to meet some ladies in a handful of hometown pieces. I don’t have something to say about everybody we met…but there are some key points I felt the need to highlight.
Josephine is a 24 year old nurse. But while in her nursing uniform, I felt like she looked more like she was dressing up to be a naughty nurse/librarian on Halloween than an actual real live nurse. Yes? #thedoctorwillseeyounow
Meet Corinne. She’s 24, lives in Miami, and describes herself as a very serious business woman. Part of me believed Corinne when she said that, but then she told America that SHE HAS A NANNY. And just in case there is any confusion, the nanny is not for her child. The Nanny is FOR HERSELF. Like she lives with her mom and dad, runs a “multi-million dollar company”, and SAYS SHE HAS A NANNY. She said, “Like even if I moved out, I would like have Raquel, like come to my house”. And that’s like a direct quote. I’m giving a total side eye to Corinne’s mom and dad right now. I mean, let’s call the poor woman that slices Corinne’s cucumbers a personal assistant or something. And let’s be honest, you know the nanny has thought about sprinkling a little arsenic on Corinne’s cucumbers a time or two. (FYI: I couldn’t think of the word “arsenic”, and I literally just googled “What’s the poison you sprinkle on food that you can’t taste.” And now I’m legit scared that I just sent up a whole bunch of red flags to some sort of internet monitoring agency.)
And I’m thinking Corinne just might be this season’s Olivia. I mean, we have to watch somebody that we love to hate. #comeatmebro
Next we met Alexis. And we found out that she’s cray. How do we know she’s cray? Because she showed us her cray right off the bat. No use beating around the bush, ya know? Alexis loves dolphins (like realllllllly loves dolphins), and long walks on the beach to CVS in a sumo wrestler costume. You can’t make this stuff up.
This is Danielle. She’s 31, a NICU nurse, and DARLING…..
But don’t worry Nick, even though she saves babies for a living….
She can also rock a pair of booty shorts like nobody’s business. So she’s totally well rounded, which is so important.
This next lady is a wild card. She was the maid of honor at Jade and Tanner’s wedding. She met Nick at the wedding, said they had “fun together”, and she implied that they did The Big Wiggle. WILL NICK REMEMBER HER? Only time will tell, but I’m excited to be along for the ride. Where do you think this girl and Jade met? Summer Camp? Maybe. I mean, if Hugh Hefner was a counselor.
LIMO TIME
It’s Limo Time!!!! HOSE DOWN THE DRIVEWAY, grab your wine bottles, make like JoJo’s mom (I miss her) and don’t even bother getting a glass because IT’S GO TIME, PEOPLE. It’s time for the PARADE O’ LADIES. And here’s what I know…if you aren’t a nurse or wearing a red dress, then you’re not going to fit in.
Danielle (27) was the first girl out of the limo, and she came out with both “guns” blazing. #wellplayed
There were several girls in a row that were kind of just ho hum. One girl talked about “making lemons into lemonade” and one girl said “4th times the charm.” And both of them acted like they had created the phrases. Girls. This is The Bachelor. You have to do better.
I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.
Lauren (30), told Nick that they both had some pretty terrible last names. Nick’s last name is Viall and Lauren’s last name is Hussy….“so basically together, you and I, are a disgusting slut.” And that my friend, is what they call foreshadowing.
Sidenote….isn’t a “restaurant server” the same thing as a “waitress”? The intern in charge of writing the “occupations” for these girls gets an A++ for creativity on that one.
Sarah (26) jogged up in a pair of Nike’s and had a great line about being a “runner-up”. I liked it.
Hailey (33) asked Nick, “Do you know what a girl wearing underwear says?” He said “No, I don’t.” And then she said “Neither do I.” OMG. It was here that I scrunched my shoulders up by my ears and turned my head to the side. (Raise your hand if you just did that too to see what it felt like.) I wanted to grab Hailey by the shoulders and shake some sense into her. Hailey. You’re a cute girl. And you’re 33. YOU’RE BETTER THAN THIS.”
The next girl didn’t say her name when she got out of the car (it’s Liz), but this is the girl that met Nick and did the Mattress Mambo about a year ago with him at Jade and Tanner’s wedding. By the way, she’s just not implying a big wiggle anymore, she’s straight up confirmed it. I appreciate the admission. There’s no time to be coy.
And although she didn’t tell him that she knew him, Nick definitely remembered something. This is the look of a man mentally scrolling through his little black book in his head.
Raven got out of the limo and started calling the hogs (as Razorback fans do). Raven is a pretty girl and seems super sweet…but I’m thinking Chris Soules is more her speed.
Josephine, the Naughty Nurse we met earlier, brought in a prop (see pic below) that confirmed her Naughty Nurse status. And she said “You’re a wiener in my book.” Josephine, here’s a word of advice for you. Don’t say wiener. Ever. And then, at her request, they went all “Lady and the Tramp” on the wiener. #barf
Another girl in red came up…but she differentiated herself from the sea of red by riding a camel. She boldly said, “I know you like a good hump, and so do I.” Even the camel looked embarrassed. Seriously, look at his face.
Alexis (23) exited the limo wearing a shark costume. LET’S REVIEW. Alexis is the girl who realllllly loves dolphins. And I can respect that. I can also respect a bold limo exit. HOWEVER, it’s not a dolphin costume. #blessherheart #katieperrycalled
COCKTAIL PARTY TIME!
Nick walked into the mansion, gave a very sweet toast, and gave me some warm fuzzy feelings. I mean, I feel like I really like him! #dontletmedownnick He said, “When I think about finding the one….throughout this process, I know I’m the Bachelor and handing out roses and that’s kind of crazy…but I want you to feel as empowered as possible. Try to make this experience as normal as possible in an abnormal world.” And y’all. He was genuine and CHARMING AS HECK.
Highlights of the cocktail party follow:
This girl is a class act. She’s an attorney from Dallas, and Nick seems to be quite smitten with her.
Corinne sat down with Nick and gave him a bag of tokens, which confused me to no end. Is her multi million dollar business a video arcade? #ilovemesomeskiball #thatwasforyoudad
After Corinne, Nick was talking to the special ed. teacher and seemed to be having a nice time, when Corinne swooped in and then started kissing him! It was a bold move (the jury is still out on if Nick was digging it or not), but it definitely put a target on her back with the other girls.
The next good bit of the night was centered around Shark Girl. And I have to say, SHE WAS COMMITTED. Like, she walked around the pool in her dolphin costume making dolphin sounds (which I have to say, sounded a lot like Chris Soule’s giggle). Girl after girl tried to tell her that she was a shark, and she would sweetly turn around to show off her costume and politely correct them by saying that she was in fact a dolphin. Nick tried to tell her as well, and she shut him down too. Shark Girl. Listen to Me. Your costume had gills. That makes you a shark. It’s just basic biology. Or is it anatomy. #whatever
The whole shark/dolphin debate made me think back to one of my favorite episodes of Friends when Rachel got a “cat”.
Nick sat down with Liz and let her know that he absolutely remembered who she was. He reminded her that he had asked for her number and that she didn’t give it to him. He told her he questioned her motives in coming on the show, because if she was really interested in him, she could have just asked Jade for his number. Good point, Nick!
He then gave the first impression rose to Rachel, the Dallas Attorney.
Who Got Roses: Vanessa (special ed. teacher), Danielle L. (boob girl first out of the limo), Christen (yellow dress with the fan), Astrid (talked in german about her boobs), Corinne (HAS A NANNY), Elizabeth (pretty girl in white lace dress), Jasmine G. (girl who got denied when she tried to steal him away from another girl) Raven (better suited for Prince Farming), Kristina (bawled like a baby saying she wasn’t going to get picked, but did), Danielle M. (the darling NICU nurse that rocks the booty shorts), Sarah (“runner up” girl), Josephine (the naughty nurse), Lacey (embarrassed the camel), Taylor (the therapist who told Nick her friends think he is a “P.O.S.”, Alexis (shark girl), Hailey (the panty dropper), Whitney (one of the 15 girls in a red dress), Dominique (another one of the 15 girls in a red dress), Jaimi (the girl with the serious nose ring), Brittany (another girl in a red dress), and Liz (the one he’s already had relations with).
Who Goes: Olivia, Angela, Lauren, Briana, Ida Marie, Jasmine B., Michelle and Susannah all went home as the sun came up.
And y’all, if the previews for the rest of the season hold true, it seems as if there are some girls that are very confident in their womanly charms. I want to make several jokes here about some things that the ladies said, but my dad reads here, and I’m shy.
Hope you enjoyed the 1st Bachelor recap of the season. PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW WITH EITHER YOUR TOP 3 picks, YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT OF THE NIGHT, or YOUR MOST CRINGE WORTHY MOMENT!
Oh, and for those of you that are new around these parts, you can check back here every Wednesday for my weekly Bachelor recap. The rest of the week I’ll be talking clothes. Click HERE to read a little bit ABOUT ME….and click HERE (I named a new MUST HAVE and shared some pics from Christmas) and HERE (I highlighted a darling layered sweater) for some examples of my posts. The picture below is from my post on Monday where I was talking about great basics.
cream sweater / jeans / must have boots / earrings / necklace / fringe bag
Get The Look For Yourself Here:
Also….It’s that time of year again where I start eating less tacos and start eating more apples. I also kick up my workouts (my neighbor tried to kill me dead yesterday morning with the new program we are doing called Max Out). Good news though, I’m going to look cute when I stop breathing and pass out.
cz studs / my favorite work out top / jacket / zella leggings ON SALE / my favorite socks / nike sneakers ON SALE
Just click on what you are interested in:
See y’all back here tomorrow for Friday Favorites!
More from my site
Bachelor Episode 6: Jasmine Choked (Literally and Figuratively)
Bachelor Finale and After The Final Rose Recap
The Bachelor Season Premiere with Stiffler’s mom, a Sloth, and a couple of Beauty Queens
The Bachelor Episode 1 Recap: A Miniature Horse, a Unicorn, and a Russian Walk Into a Mansion…..
Friday Favorites – Bachelor Recap Edition
Bachelor Episode 7: Corinne Has a Heart of Gold, But That’s Not All….
Erika Slaughter says
I wasn’t a fan of Nick either but he won me over on the first episode. He made jokes, seemed genuinely interested in getting to know each girl, and made it fun! My top picks are booty shorts girl (she was cute!!), Raven from AR (probably my AR roots are urging me to pull for her), and first impressions rose girl (go Dallas)!! Your hashtags were my favorite today! Great job, girl!
Shay Shull says
Woohoo!!!!!! It’s Bachelor recap time!!! Insert my happy dance HERE!
Leslie Z. says
I’m SO HAPPY it’s that time of year again! Your recaps are THE BEST. The arsenic comment literally had me laughing out loud. Can’t wait for next week!!
http://Www.withlovefromgablog.blogspot.com
Stephanie Simon says
YES! The recaps are back! Your google search made me lol too. Other favorite: #katieperrycalled. Hahahaha! I like the NICU nurse and special ed. teacher the most. And I’m with you, so far I like Nick too.
Britt says
I have two words: platinum vagine. Love your recaps so much!
Krista G says
This was my favorite line of the night! I could not stop laughing!!!
Melissa says
I love reliving the show with your recap–so glad you’ve kept at it!!!!
Narci says
Laughing so hard!!! I think this is going to be a good season!! Love it all, and I can’t stop laughing at the embarassed camel. Haha!! #looksthisface
Deborah says
Yay!! The Bachelor recaps are back!!! #bestpartoftheshow And I totally LOVE how you respect your daddy…….some of the contestants could use some home-training! #youwereraisedright 🙂
Stacey says
Yay!! I love your recaps. One of my New Years Resolutions was to give up Bachelor (its killing me after reading this) but I will never give up reading the recaps! Maybe tell your dad to skip reading on Wednesdays so we can get all the juicy details ????
Sarah says
The NICU nurse, attorney and Special Ed teacher are my faves so far! And I’m with you, I’m loving Nick too! Wasn’t a big fan of him on the Bachelorette but he’s totally been redeeming himself on this first episode! Can’t wait for another season of Bachelor blogs! ????
Farryn Bussa says
I’m so excited for the recaps.. like seriously excited! I’m also pumped for this season! The Bachelor never gets old!
My question is, did anyone notice that it was dark outside when the girls came in from the limos … but after the rose ceremony and he let some girls go home, it was light outside ? This totally confused me!! Anyone else ?
Sheaffer says
Hi, Farryn! The rose ceremony and cocktail party lasts ALL NIGHT LONG! When the girls left, it was the next morning!!!!
Farryn Bussa says
Thanks for the clarification. I had not noticed that in the past.
Lynn B says
It’s because they tape all night (cocktail party last all night) & it’s early morning when they finish. My son in law is best friends with Peter Brady (aka Ben Higgins) so I have a few inside knows. #notenoughhowever
Shelly Braun says
Amazing recap as always!! You are spot on and I look forward to these seasons
and your recaps!! ????????
Amys says
You made me spit out my coffee! Hilarious as usual! I like Danielle, Rachel and Sarah right now.
Laci Murray says
I swear I laughed out loud AT WORK reading this! Oh my goodness hilarious!! This season is definitely going to be comical, and I always liked Nick. I mean, he does “wiggle” a lot…BUT…..maybe he’s ready to turn over a new leaf. New Year New Nick?? :))
heidi says
For the first time since Trista &Ryan I chose not ti watch this season I didn’t care for nick, which is putting it nicely.. but girl now I think I need to.. because # train wreck and #imalreadycringingbehindapillow
Why do these women do that to themselves, why, for the love.
Jenna says
I LOVE these recaps. I’m rooting for baby saving nurse who rocks booty shorts. I’d have to say also that Rachel, the Dallas attorney also won for best red dress there.
Sarah Lewis says
PUH-LEASE tell me you’re playing the Bachelor Fantasy League online this season. It is literally the funniest thing! Plus, you could win tickets to the end of season show…so….#worthit
Keely says
I’m a tad disappointed you didn’t mention the crazy pit sweats Prince Farming was sporting. What was he so nervous about??? Lol!
Pumped your recaps are BACK!
For the record…..I’ve always loved Nick. #badboysforthewin
Michele says
I like the Dallas attorney right now, but more importantly, I’m already ready for Corrine and dolphin girl to go home lol
Katie says
Hi Sheaffer! Love your recaps! I did want to let you know that a “server” is a gender-neutral term for waiter/waitress. It’s not something the producers made up, it’s actually a word that people in the restaurant business use. Can’t speak for dolphin enthusiast though… 🙂
Keisha Dawson says
I’m not even watching this year, but I love your recaps! Thank you!
Jody says
Hey Sheaffer!! So many cringe worthy moments! The camel, shark girl, the wiener, underwear question, Corrine…,ugh!!!! I need some group dates before I pick my favs….. Should be a good season! LOVE your recaps!!
Rebecca Jo says
So glad you’re back with another year of recaps.
I’m with you – what is Chris Soles still doing on here? He’s STILL single, right?
& thanks for Alexis picture -I had no idea what shark girl really looked like.
Kathi Mackintosh says
#sheafferhasthebesthashtags #loveyourwit
Erin Hill says
The whole time I was watching I was saying “you’re not a shark” just like Joey and the “cat” on Friends. Ha. And I am team Nick.. I think he’s fab. And hot, which doesn’t hurt. haha
Susan says
I don’t even watch the show but I LOVE your recaps. I am reading at work (oops) and LOL out loud so much that everyone is making me read out loud your awesome statements. You are hilarious!
April Parrish says
I was a little disappointed when they announced Nick as the Bachelor, because I was hoping for Luke…but I think this season will not disappoint!!! Love your recaps! You keep me smiling the entire time!
Ashley says
#Corinanny has got to go!!! Loveddd Vanessa, Danielle M. and Sarah. Her lil Runner-Up act was darling!
Also LOLed because Whitney Bischoff tweeted the same thing about Chris S. – why was he chosen to give advice?
Suzanne says
I think I look forward more to your recaps than the show!!!!! And awesome respecting your dad! I love that! Thank you for keeping up with this Sheaffer – I don’t know how you come up with some of this stuff. Especially the hashtags and old pics you resurrect of former contestants! Hilarious! ????
Sydnee says
Hi Sheaffer, LOVE these recaps! The Dallas Attorney and the NICU nurse were two of my favorites. As for dolphin (shark, what?) girl, I can’t wait too see how much more crazy comes out if this was how much came out the first night (lol). No underwear girl’s (I think I blushed and I was alone in my own home!) introduction was almost too much for me 🙂
Sarah says
I’m a little biased, but I like the Canadian, Vanessa, from Montreal. She seems well rounded and is also beautiful. I like the sweet girl from Arkansas but I don’ know if I can handle her accent. Can’t wait for the upcoming ridiculousness that is The Bachelor!
shar y says
So funny and glad these recaps are back. Just in general, I want to say, what are some of these women thinking?? Their antics will live forever. No underwear? Sharkgirl? Camel? Just boggles the mind. But, I like Nick and am really looking forward to the season. #gonnagetcrazier
Audrey says
I was ridiculously happy to read you’re recap this morning. Best thing about the new year is the return of my Monday night guilty pleasure. So I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for Nick because I thought he was just a bit misunderstood. Really liked him on BIP this summer, and super impressed with how he handled himself week 1. I think he’s going to go for class, so I see the front runners being the Dallas attorney and the NICU nurse, although maybe that’s because the producers are already slanting it that way. I predict Corrine will self destruct without anyone around to slice her veggies for her. See you next week!
GIna Z. says
Hooray for your recaps being back! So fun!
Hailey- the panties girl.. is 23. I remember that because I literally said to my girlfriends “wow…that girl is pretty and does not look like she’s only 23!” So, not that that excuses her saying what she said about not wearing panties, but makes it a liiiitle more tolerable… maybe. 🙂
LOVE love LOVE Danielle the NICU nurse. And Vanessa. They’re also a few of the only age appropriate ones for him… I was super surprised at how many young ones there were..he is 36! A 23/24 year old is not going to be good for him…..
Also.. I met Nick this summer at an appearance he was doing (my hometown in WI is near his) and he is funny and charming.. just like he comes across. I cannot WAIT to see how the season plays out!
Thanks Sheaffer! 🙂
Christine says
Sheaffer,
I really liked Danielle M. (From Nash)! She seemed pretty down to earth. Fun fact about her, she was in country singer Coke Swindell’s music video Middle Of A Memory!
Danielle says
Am I the only one that has loved Nick from the beginning? I was so excited to hear he was the bachelor! Loved your recap! I laughed out loud several times! My favorite girls are the two Danielle’s, which is my name too! Also, I really like Rachel. I really don’t think Liz should have another chance. She had nine months to get in touch with him and she didnt.
Sonya says
That Ashley I face never gets old. Corrine with the nanny – seriously? I agree that she will be the Olivia of this season. I’m glad he called Liz out. Even if he only asked for her number to be polite, if she didn’t want to give it to him after they hooked up, then why come after him on the show? I like Danielle.
Priscilla says
Loved the attorney and the special ed. teacher.
Mary says
That comment about google had me laughing out loud ???? I wasn’t a fan of Nick, didn’t watch BIP and gave up on the show but reading this recap made me miss it!!!
Alli Lodde says
OBSESSED WITH NICK. I always have been and everyone thought I was cray. He is super charming, awkward, and genuine! Calling it right now. Top 3 will be Danielle M., Rachel, and Vanessa. Only time will tell! 🙂
Kathy L. says
Your recaps of the Bachelor/Bachelorette are so much fun and I look forward to them each week! I was a little surprised when Nick was announced as the new Bachelor, but I grew to like him more on BIP, and I think he handled the first episode well. Just my opinion, but Nick sounded less trite and more genuine. #nicechangeofpace
My three favorites are: Danielle, the neonatal nurse from Nashville where I live (#saythat5timesquickly); Vanessa, the Canadian special ed teacher; and Rachel, the attorney from Dallas who got the first impression rose. I think Corinne, the business owner who still needs a nanny from Miami, is definitely going to win the award this season for “most hated”.
Rose says
Hi Sheaffer!! I LIVE for your recaps since I don’t watch the show until it gets down to the final 3-4. The Bachelor franchise should totally pay you a commission!
Would love for you to share what you are doing to lose weight. I tend to gain 10-15 pounds over the course of the year, then find myself needing a “correction”. I refuse to go up a size, call me hard headed but dang it gets hard! Lol!
Sheaffer says
Hi, Rose! I just do what I do every year at this time. I watch my calories, fat, and carbs…and I work out 5/7 days a week. I refuse to go up a size as well! xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂
Kelly McNellis says
I’m soooooo happy your recaps are back! I’m all about Rachel, Vanessa, and Danielle L so far. Corinne is too much like Vienna to me…I can’t stand her already! Entitled little snot!!
On a side note, I agree with you on Chris Soules’ hair — I totally thought that needed to go. Looking forward to this season as all the drama unfolds 🙂
Amy Smith says
Your recaps are the best ever! I read with a smile on my face the whole time! ha!
Crystal says
These recaps are the #1 reason I began watching the show again last year after I found your site! You crack me up! Love your shopping posts ( my husband and my cc do not for obvious reasons) and most of all love your sense of humor. Keep em coming! Happy 2017!
Kim Fox says
Love your recaps as much as I love The Bachelor! Did anyone else think Naughty Nurse looks like Joan Cusak? ????
Stephanie Zapata says
I haven’t watched The Bachelor in forever but I’ve read your recaps for the last few seasons and thought they were hilarious so I decided they’d be even funnier if I watched the show-THAT’S how dedicated I am to your blog!
I love the SpEd teacher, the NICU nurse, & the Dallas attorney. I’m horrible with names so that’s all I got.
Can’t wait for the next episode and especially your recap!
Julie Hedenborg says
I didn’t know if I could stomach watching this season as I don’t care for Nick, but I am already following. I hope he has changed, and that he can find a true companion. His family seems nice and seeing him with little sister gave me hope.
Love the updates. Yes, Corinne is spot on Olivia, although I haven’t seen her ankles. I actually think they stage the Corinne encounter (where she comes to wiggle) so he can tell her no in an attempt to redeem himself in front of America, but just my two cents. I can’t help but wonder what her parents and family must think of her behavior and her platinum parts! That Nanny has got to be sitting back and giggling through her bowl of popcorn.
I loved the guys advising him. Sean, Peter Brady, and Chris have to be the nicest guys that have even been on the show and I loved it. I admit I just loved seeing the updates on the other couples. There have been wins!
So far I like the NICU nurse, and the attorney. Danielle was gorgeous, but the guns blazing was a bit much for me, maybe I am just jealous;). I like the Lexington KY girl (that is my home town), but she is too nice and, like myself, probably won’t last among the other girls with their more assertive personalities. We shall see…
Julie
Julie Hedenborg says
OH yeah, and I think Liz was the one contractually obligated vote that the show gets to add. He was completely turned off and I think she might just now be interested given that he is now the Bachelor. You can tell it killed him to say her name.
Julie Luker says
LOVE LOVE LOVE reading your recaps! They always make me laugh. Keep em coming!
Rachelle says
I don’t know that I can bring myself to watch this season. Nick just makes me a little sick to my stomach 🙂 , but reading your recap I might change my mind. I do love your recaps more than the show:) lol You say what I’m thinking.
Stacey Lagrone says
This is awesome! Danielle (NICU nurse) is my favorite! Looking forward to the rest of the season a lot, but maybe (definitely) looking forward to your recaps for the rest of the season a lot more!
Lacey salmon says
I love your recaps!!! Thank you thank you thank you! So funny.
Brooke Richardson says
It was all funny but the “wiener” part has hilarious. And Dang it, I said the word. #mustnoteversayagain #barf
Rebecca says
I LOVE your recaps and seriously I say this every new season but ABC should pay you for these- they are absolutely classic!! Can’t wait to continue reading them throughout the season- you nailed this one!! And seriously I totally agree with you – Nick seems to be adorable and I am all with you- #dontletusdown 🙂 hahaha and I cracked up about when you said that you were confused why Chris was giving advice… I was the exact same way!
Patty says
Was it me or did anyone notice that Josephine looks a lot like Erica Rose (The Socialite) from Season 9? Also, I don’t know what I look forward to more the show or your review…..I think it’s your review!!
Jen K. says
Seriously – BEST Bachelor recaps in the history of the entire Bachelor franchise. You make me laugh so hard I almost fall off my chair each week!
#nailedit
Stacey M says
Love love LOVE the recaps, actually don’t even watch the show! Occasionally I watch at the end after you have piqued my interest. #theyshouldpayyou
s says
I never comment but just had to say how funny this was!
FYI: I couldn’t think of the word “arsenic”, and I literally just googled “What’s the poison you sprinkle on food that you can’t taste.” And now I’m legit scared that I just sent up a whole bunch of red flags to some sort of internet monitoring agency.
Allison says
I started reading your Friday Favorites a couple of months ago. I haven’t watched the Bachelor in years, but your re-cap was hilarious! I will be back weekly for the re-cap in addition to the FF.
Colleen P. says
I have a nickname for Nick! “Kenickie” (he was the bad boy on Grease)
He’s kind of a bad boy and it has his name already in it! keNICKie ????
I love your recaps so much!
Erin Resser says
I am SO happy you are doing these again! I know it can’t be easy! My first thought of Hailey was that she was trying to be the “weird one” very similar to Ashley S. from Chris’ season. I cringed at the wiener joke, too. SO BAD. How did she think that was a good joke?! Yikes!
Olivia says
I love the NICU nurse! She is adorable! And did anyone else recognize Jasmine G?? She was on 3 seasons of Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team which is on CMT. She got cut last season as a 3 year veteran for gaining weight, and I believe they commented on her tryout routine being sloppy and amateur….or something to that effect. Eek!!
Sanna says
Yes, I watched that also, and recognized her right away too.
Sanna says
I have always wondered if the intro jokes are made up by the producers and then told to the contestants to say to make them look stupid…
Also, Sheaffer, does that fringe bag have an adjustable strap so you can wear it longer??
Sheaffer says
Hi, Sanna! No adjustable strap. Sorry! xoxo, Sheaffer 🙂